“Ah Yes, That’s Just Your Age” and Other Medical Miracles

There is a magical moment in life when every symptom you experience stops being a medical issue and starts being a personality trait of your birth year.

Headache? It’s your age. Knee pain? It’s your age. Fatigue? Your age. Dizziness, heart palpitations, numbness in your arm, and the sudden feeling that gravity has personally targeted you? Definitely your age.

At some point, it seems that many doctors stop practicing medicine and start practicing age -based diagnosis.

Once they hear that you are “older,” you don’t need tests or imaging. You don’t even need to finish your sentence.“ How old are you?” Once you say the magic number, the next words that the doctor utters are, “Oh. That explains everything.”

Apparently, after a certain birthday, the diagnostic process becomes short but not always so sweet. Consider this scenario: after listening to the patient’s complaints, the doctor asks, "Are you over 60?” The patient says, “Yes,” and then the doctor responds, “Then everything is normal.”

Perhaps some doctors might continue the questioning. The patient is asked if they have chest pain, trouble sleeping, memory problems, problems walking, or any strange new pains that weren’t there 3 weeks before. Unfortunately, the doctor’s response is “well you are getting older!”

At this point, you could walk into an office missing a limb, and you might be told, “Well, at your age, these things happen.”

You didn’t come in because you’re old. You came in because something feels wrong. But once “age” is declared the cause, the symptom is no longer investigated, measured, treated, or taken seriously.

You are the diagnosis. Sometimes what’s really being communicated is: This decline is to be expected at your age, just deal with it. Finding something wrong requires effort. And effort is apparently optional once you qualify for the senior discount. Some dangerous conditions can be overlooked because they are attributed to aging.

If your car made a strange noise, no mechanic would say, “Well, it’s not new.” They would look under the hood. But when humans falter, the diagnosis is simply aging. Which is comforting. Until something really bad ha